January 6, 2011

Empire state of mind!

For the first time in years, this new years eve (NYE), I was thinking that I have never been more zen than I am right now.

For so many years I have been thinking - will things never change? Will it soon fall into place? Will it get better? 
Don´t get me wrong... I have been blessed in many ways & I am thankful for it! 
It´s just that I had a feeling that things were not completely right.
So this year, finally, I am at peace. 
Filled with gratitude for what I do & the passion! 
It seems things are as they should be and they are on track.

I have the last ten years, always shed a tear on this particular evening. 
Thinking of what has been and what is no longer. 

I have lost loved ones, and for every NYE I have felt them slip further and further away and somehow this loss kept me holding on to unrealistic dreams. 
As time went by, I was terrified that I would forget them. 
That all the beautiful memories I had of them would somehow disappear, not fully realizing that this is a conception of reality that is not coherent with life itself. 

The loved ones that I lost are always in my heart and they ARE forever a piece of me and my soul.

On the 86th floor of Empire State Building you get a certain perspective...

If you zone out from all the noise & the people, you are at such a height that everything seems so small.
All the stupid stuff that we struggle with each and every day, seem so unimportant.

Pettiness & Ego please step aside as I am welcoming a new decade and state of mind!

I dedicate this picture to Linn, Gjermund and Erik...
I know you are still here in spirit. 

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